Unknown + Lies

The most evil band on earth is coming to the most evil place on earth (New Jersey) to play the most evil show ever in the history of evil!!!! Yes SLAYER!!! (please accent the "UURRRGGGHH" sound when you read this) is coming to fuck up the NYC metro area. Are you ready you piss-ant hipsters? Been listening to the White Stripes on your i-pod? YOU WILL BURN!!!!!!

Me and my crew are ready. We've got our tickets (most important). Here's me doing METAL push-ups - gotta make sure the horns are raised high and proud. 666 push-ups are recommended. (I did two).

Now I'm doing neck stretches - the old man wouldn't want to pull anything while thrashing his head to the thunderous beats! That wouldn't be too hardcore...

That's right, this shit is ON. But there's still more preparing to do!! Here's the list:

• prepare cooler full of canned beer and bring tool to poke hole for shotgunning.
  
• practice shotgunning since I haven't done this since college (many years).
  
• decal pentagram on the hood of the car.
  
• find a taker for our EXTRA TICKET!!!!
  

You heard (read) right! We have one more ticket if you want to join me and my crew to see Slayer at the Continental Airlines Arena on June 16, 2006. Think you're METAL enough? Comment on this post if you're interested. If you know my email, email me. If you know my phone #, blah, blah, blah.
\m/

Post a Comment